You'll Never Be Alone
by femegade
Summary: Despite Shepard's orders, Garrus stayed behind to assist her in reaching the beam that leads to the Citadel and the Catalyst. However, the devastation suffered from Harbinger's interception may have been their end. Directly following ME3's ending.
1. Her Alone

**This short bit takes place post ME3 ending. I don't particularly know where I'm going with this as of yet but there will most likely be a second part. Just something I had to get out of my mind for the time being.**

**As a side-note, I've had "Her Alone" by Amorphis going through my head the whole time I wrote this.**

* * *

He crawled through the rubble to reach her. Concrete and scaffolding lay in heaps, making it difficult to maneuver. Hauling his battered body over another large block of debris, he followed what little bit of her scent he could pick out of the overwhelming blood and smoke. It seemed like hours before he finally found her. Her armor was cracked and charred. Blood seeped from her wounds, covering her skin in a dark ominous sheen. When he finally managed to pull himself next to her, he scooped his beloved in his arms. The acrid odor of death nearly overpowered him; however, it wasn't from her. Her chest heaved. She still lived. His own voice sounded choked and foreign as he used his communicator to call for help. There was no response.

Garrus had never cried. Not even when he found out about her death during the destruction of the original Normandy. Nor when his team was annihilated on Omega, leaving him to fight on alone, beside their squalid bodies. He'd felt anguish, sure. But he _never_ cried. Now foreign tears streamed down his face as he held his broken and bloodied lover tightly in his arms. Her breath was worryingly shallow and she was unresponsive to his please or touches. It hurt… Oh Spirits did it hurt. Never had he felt so helpless. She was dying in his arms and he could do nothing but wait for help to arrive.

Corpses and debris were strewn around them, a result of Harbinger's fatal beam. The shooting and explosions around them had long-since stopped. He couldn't be certain where the battle had gone… but it didn't matter. He peered down at her bruised and tattered face. His own tears streamed down her cheek, clearing away the blood and dirt in streaks. As her breath grew increasingly shallow all seemed hopeless and the shuttle was nowhere in sight.

His hand stroked against the pistol that lay at his side, taking comfort in its presence. If she were to die in his arms tonight, he'd be ready to follow her. They would meet at that bar just like he had promised. "You said I'd never be alone, Shepard… Well neither will you," he whispered, touching his forehead to hers. "_Never._" The chill of her skin tore him apart inside. He knew their time grew near.

He remained that way for a time, his surroundings fading into nothingness, waiting for the moment her heart failed to pump the next mililiter of life through her veins. He didn't hear the shuttle arrive. Didn't hear the roar of voices that broke the silence of the night. All he was able to comprehend was that only thing he truly loved was being ripped from his arms and carried off into the blinding lights. The only thing he could think to do was reach for her. But his grappling hands caught only dead night air.


	2. I'll Be Here

As she struggled to maintain her grip on either side of the console, she could see her flesh begin to burn away; and yet somehow, she felt no pain. A bittersweet smile tugged at the corner of her lips. This was the right choice. Her sacrifice would allow countless others to live in peace. Synthetics and organics would be given the chance to co-habit the galaxy, while she alone would control the beings that threatened that future. She thought about the newfound alliance between the geth and the quarians. Because of her, that alliance would continue to flourish. Her mind then wandered to the blooming relationship between EDI and Joker. A large part of her sacrifice would be dedicated to their continual happiness.

Her heart fell in sorrow when she thought about the one person she loved the most. His blue-grey eyes pierced her soul, giving her strength yet, at the same time, instilling regret. She regretted leaving him behind. But, deep down she hoped that somehow, he would find the will to carry on without her.

Suddenly a chill ran up her spine. Feelings of anxiety and dread began to overtake her for reasons she couldn't explain. Then, she felt a hint of pleasure, like the whisper of a lover feathering against her ear. It took a hold of her in unfathomable ways, ebbing away at her self-control. It frightened her.

"Shepard…" the raspy, yet strangely calming voice filled her ears and she recognized it almost immediately. _Harbinger_. Its voice, typically taunting, was now soothing… Almost welcoming. It enveloped her; caressed her. She felt calm in its presence. Wanted to obey. "You are ours," it said, satisfied with her choice.

* * *

Garrus had remained by her side for a week while she lay unconscious in the makeshift hospital. He'd never left, except for those cases where it was absolutely necessary; which was why he was the first one to see her finally stir from her slumber.

"Shepard…" Her name felt like a lingering sweetness on his tongue, one that he longed to savor. Enveloping her hand with his, he edged closer to the bedside.

"Garrus—" Her voice was a choked sob and her eyes held a sorrow and shame that he couldn't comprehend. When she turned her face away from him, he felt as if he was stabbed through the heart. "I'm sorry, Garrus… I - I failed," she said through a constricted throat.

"No," he assured her, leaning forward to nuzzle her neck. She smelled of old blood and disinfectant; a scent that was extraordinarily reassuring at the moment. "Why would you say that?"

"I gave into them," she managed to utter through clenched teeth.

He pulled back to stare at her, confusion swimming in his blue eyes. "Gave into who? Shepard, what are you talking about?"

She sat up abruptly, covering her head with her hands as memories flooded forth. "The Reapers!" she shouted. Then she quickly yanked her bandaged hands away from her head as if they singed her skin. She stared at them with evident fear in her eyes before savagely ripping away at the bandages that covered what lay beneath.

"Shepard! What are you doing?" Garrus asked, frantically grabbing her hands. He held them still in front of her, following her confused stare. Aside from being terribly cut and bloodied, they were fine.

Uncertainty swam in her gaze as her eyes snapped up to peer at her concerned lover. "What happened to the Reapers? Why am I even _here_?"

He could understand her reason for asking the first question, but the second baffled him. "The Reapers were destroyed, Shepard. Anderson was the only one to make it to the beam. He activated the Crucible. I found you in the rubble, where Harbinger's attack hit us."

"Anderson?" she gasped. "But how..?"

Garrus shook his head. "I was knocked out when you were, so I don't know all the details. But shortly after his rescue, the Admiral died of his wounds. I'm sorry, Shepard... I know you two were close."

She hung her head in defeat, short dark hair falling over her face like a curtain. "So it was all a hallucination?" She paused, shaking her head as if something just didn't compute. "Why?"

Garrus placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. He had the sudden urge to tear his claws through something out of rage when she recoiled from him. The one person he cared for so deeply was alive, but painfully distant. It was as if his presence caused her pain, and it made him feel sick and furious all at once. Despite this, he somehow managed to remain calm. "Shepard…" he rumbled.

"I'm sorry, Garrus. I just need some time." It was apparent that she strained to keep her voice steady.

"I'll be here if you need me," Garrus replied softly.

* * *

**Chapter notes: I'd like to note some things that aren't explicitly called out, but implied. In this ending, neither the mass relays nor the Citadel were destroyed. I took the path of "indoctrination theory"; whether it's true or not, I wanted to make it work.**

**There will be one more chapter, and it will explain where the Reapers had erred and provide a bit of closure.**


	3. By Your Side

Since waking from unconsciousness, Shepard felt a strange emptiness inside her. It was as if a small piece of her had been cut away. Extraordinarily enough, the hole became more intense when she contemplated on the Reapers' end. Thanks to Anderson's final act of courage, life in their cycle would continue. But why did she feel so damn sad?

"Commander." The sound of Javik's voice broke her from her dark thoughts. She glanced up to find the Prothean's four eyes staring at her, searchingly. For the four days since she awoke, most of her surviving friends had stopped by the "hospital" at least once, but his was the first time since the final assault, that she'd seen the Prothean.

"Javik," she greeted with a weak smile.

Crossing his arms over his chest, his four golden eyes blinked at her. "You cannot fool me with your false human expressions," he told her. "You've obtained victory, yet you are discouraged. Why?"

"I don't know," she muttered, looking away from his prying eyes.

"You do know," he stated, stepping closer to her bedside. "But you won't admit it to yourself."

She swallowed hard, eyes still turned away defiantly. She suddenly felt a light pressure on her shoulder, and almost instantly, the images flooded into her mind.

Hands gripped the luminous console. Skin blackened and burned away. She felt the hope that had filled her then; felt the regret, the fear, and finally her submission to_ them_. When the bleak surroundings finally faded, she was back in her hospital bed. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and she quickly wiped them away. "So now you know," she said bitterly. "I fell into their trap. I failed everyone."

Javik shook his head. "No. You did just as was expected of you. You beat them."

She jerked her head up to stare at him, eyebrows knitted in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"The Reapers underestimated, not only you, but all organics. They saw _you_ as their prime threat. However, their largest threat wasn't _you_ but the courage you inspire in those around you. Your friend, the Admiral, made it to the Catalyst because of their miscalculation. If the Reapers had not been so focused on you, rather than those who fought at your side, he never would have made it."

"That still doesn't excuse the choice I made. If not for Anderson, I'd just be another Saren or Illusive Man," she spat, waving her hand dismissively

"You made what you felt was the right choice. Whether we're right or wrong, it is the ability to make those choices that separates us from the machines."

"Yeah…" she sighed, rubbing her fingertips over her eyes.

"There is still another choice that lays ahead of you, Commander," Javik told her. Shepard blinked at him questionably before he continued. "Right now, a lonely turian sits outside this building. It is pathetic to see one of his race mope over a female."

A smile tugged at the corner of her cracked lips. "Thanks, Javik."

* * *

Shepard hobbled to the main entrance of the shambled building, ignoring the pain her injuries cause when she moved. Just as Javik said, she found Garrus seated on the steps, peering out over the lowering sun.

"Been out here long?" she asked, plopping down beside him.

He shrugged. "Only a few days," he responded with a light laugh.

When she slid her hand over his, he seemed to become a bit rigid, but remained silent. "I'm sorry, Garrus," she murmured.

When a few moments had passed without a response, she could only assume he was rightfully angry with her. Removing her hand from his, she was about to stand when he grabbed her wrist gently to stop her.

Leaning forward, he pointed towards his back. "Hop on."

"What?" she asked, arching a brow in confusion.

"I want to show you something, and it's too far for you to walk right now."

"O-okay." She hesitantly and awkwardly climbed onto his back, arms harnessed around his neck. He supported her sore legs securely around his narrow waist.

He traveled lightly over debris and wreckage, weaving through streets and alleyways, only coming to a stop when they'd reached the river Thames that ran through the center of London. Stepping up to the railing, he released her legs and let her gently slide from his back. They stood side-by-side, peering out over the tranquil waters. The deep golden sun was setting over the remains of rustic architecture. Amidst all the destruction, Shepard could see that the clock tower still stood like a beacon of hope.

"I know it's not necessarily warm and tropical… But I figured it'd do for now," Garrus rumbled in her ear.

She turned toward him, a smile plastered on her face. Bittersweet tears threatened to flow as she peered into those stormy blue eyes. "I love you, Garrus Vakarian."

Grinning, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and gazed at the setting sun as it blanketed their world in an orange glow. "And I love you… Mrs. Shepard-Vakarian."

_Mrs. Shepard-Vakarian. She liked the sound of that. _She leaned into him, taking comfort in his warmth. "Didn't bring your sniper rifle?" she asked teasingly.

Garrus laughed in response. "I thought I'd take it easy on you… this time."

* * *

**The ending was a little sappy, I know, but I think we deserve some sappiness! Hope everyone enjoyed!**


End file.
